Either rugby or doggy may give me more purpose in life. I miss the feeling of having a goal or a mark that we need to reach. I miss the competitive or more on the teamwork that I was surrounded with.

I wished that I was able to go in a course where talent mattered, not who could eat and vomit out everything the most. Talented based would be either you have it or you don't, that was be more comforting than knowing youare supposedly   'dumber' than your all A's friend. 

Looking at my Uni acceptance letter doesn't bring me as much joy as getting accepted in tourism. I wonder whether would it be better if I went to another course instead. 

I just need to find that thing that I'm good at, that thing that is my thing. I don't want to make millions ( wouldn't be bad if I did) but I just want to know what I can do better than the rest. I just don't want to fade into the background. Maybe that's why I am sensitive when people say you cannot do this and that. I would want to prove to them that I can do it.

I predict myself changing jobs frequently. I cannot imagine myself doing anything for life. Like my mum in Singtel for 30 over years. 

My purpose in life, is to find my purpose in life. 

I want adventure, I am trying to change to be more daring to get it.